Minimalize to the max!

We're so minimalistic that we didn't have to attend the inauguration or hear about it in the news. We just waited for our Air Force broadcaster daughter to send us photos, pointing out her exact whereabouts using advanced digital squiggly line technology!

 

 

We're so minimalistic that we cleared out our Los Angeles studio and realized all we need is two lumpy air mattresses and matching laptops!

 

 

We’re so minimalistic that since moving near Hollywood, we got the "glamor bug" and set up a full production studio in our mini apartment!

 

We're so minimalisitc that we put all our life plans on multi-colored stickies... plastered to our super barren wall!

 

 

We're so minimalistic that we turned dumpster-destined doodads into creatively-contrived coasters (& stuff)!

 

We’re so minimalistic that we live in a 400 square-foot studio and found 40 square feet to spare for sweeeeeeeeeeeeet home office tax deduction!

 

We're so minimalistic that when moving to Los Angeles, we sold our trailer in a jiffy on Craigslist, moved into temporary military lodging with room to spare and watched the movers haul away a whopping 2 boxes and 1 suitcase!

 

 

We’re so minimalistic that we went on a Veterans Day freebie adventure, and got more than intended!

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We're so minimalistic that all it takes is a bow tie, scarf, purse and… instant formal!

 

We're so minimalistic that we’ve managed to maneuver infamous LA traffic with our tiny toy car, and think all the obnoxious honking is not due to congestion and irate nerves, but perhaps our happy-go-lucky bumper sticker!

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We're so minimalistic that when it comes to killing bugs we don’t use fancy-smancy sprays and swatters. We just take a shoe and throw it at the evil critter (and this helps with phobias of getting too close to arachnids that scare the beejeebies out of me)!

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We're so minimalistic that we used an in-flight barf bag as a business card!

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We're so minimimalistic that we limit our wardrobe to a few simple colors that just so happens to match our car and the wardrobe of others!

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We're so minimalistic that all we need is a pair of groovy sunglasses and a great team to invest in real estate!

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We're so minimalistic that hobbits love us and invite us over to hobbitville hangouts to teach them our simple living secrets!

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We're so minimalistic that the only fancy clothes we have is the cheap bling we bought on our way to Beverly Hills!

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We’re so minimalistic that the only thing we bought during Christmas were these 2 goofy hats!

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We're so minimalistic that we never wear makeup (unless Wayne is doing a photo shoot)!

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We're so minimalistic that it only takes 3 steps to cook dinner!

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We're so minimalistic that we don’t own any games. We just show up to a local coffee shop and join in someone else’s game (and flash the “winner wannabe” gangsta sign while doing it)!

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We're so minimalistic that we find symbols everywhere to prove that ultimate simplicity reigns… and photo bombing a 250-year-old lone cypress drives home our point!

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We're so minimalistic that we went in search of hobbit homes in Carmel by the Sea, and the only thing we could find were these ostentatious dwarf dwellings that are way too big for Bilbo!

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We're so minimalistic that our life is almost as simple as this dog that we chased down the highway in crazy California!

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We're so minimalistic that we think we own less that this homeless person we spotted in a parking lot!

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We're so minimalistic that we rarely use plates (you know you’re jealous because you have to do dishes!)

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We’re so minimalistic that we have a mobile office wherever we go!

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We're so minimalistic that sometimes we don’t even wear socks!

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We’re so minimalistic that we don' have diamonds in our diamond rings!

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We’re so minimalistic that we created our business plan on a sticky!

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We’re so minimalistic that we sold our condo and kept only 2 car loads of stuff!

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We’re so minimalistic that we now live in a trailer down by the river just like Chris Farley!

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And, Wayne is on the path to become a motivational speaker (just like Chris Farley)!

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How I paid $92 for a cup of coffee!

Last time I wrote about my $10 coffee but I’m starting to think my cost is much higher!

Today I drove to the coffee shop to pay a pretty penny for a “simple” cup of coffee.

Step 1: Put over-priced California gas in car. Price: too much!

Step 2: Drive down congested Los Angeles highway dodging moronic maniacs. Price: 2 years off my life dealing with idiots!

Step 3: Pull into parking lot and pay $3 parking fee (on a freakin’ weekend!). Price: $3 too much!

Step 4: Enter coffee shop and stand in line waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long! Price: 2 more years off my life!

Step 5: Order coffee using my $30 travel mug I bought at Target. Price: $30 too much! (because stingy coffee shop rarely gives me travel mug discount!)

Step 6: Sit down with caustic cup of coffee: Price: 5 more years off my life (because it’s poisonous bean water)!